Do we have clearance, Clarence?

I know. Different movie but I couldn’t resist.

It’s the smell of success. No doubt.

Like this comment if you recently farted.

The family pets disagree.

Geese have entered the chat with an unapologetic level of aggression

Have you heard the one where your fiesta takes adderall?

It turns into a focus.

Not original material but I had to say it

I’ll always have mad respect for Hockeytown/Motown/De-troit Motor City. Fuck around with them and you’ll get politefully wrecked.

AI circlejerks itself far too often

The importance of properly winterizing for February starts with suffering through October and November.

Fred Durst would like some hot dog flavored water with that to really keep things rollin’

The entire service fee thing is fraud at this point. Undercutting wages and skimming profits for owners off the backs of their employees.

I know it’s been happening forever but this shit has been escalating exponentially.

The headliner refers to the main entertainer of the the show that comes on stage after the opening/warm-up acts finish performing. You have to get through the opening acts before you see the one you actually came for.

But you have to give respect to those old-timey crocs.

Sure! I’m transferring your call now!

A few years back you could say “operator” or press zero to get transferred to an actual person. In my experience it only works about 1/3 of the time these days.

Sometimes the system would even escalate your call if you were swearing while you were on hold.

And if things get any better, millenials need to remember to not fuck it up.

Winberries are delicious.

Dislikes? I was trying to start a discussion. Did I miss something?

Keanu, Levar, and Cena are the outliers for the greater good. Can’t we all just get along? Tribalism, revenge, and unnecessary violence are going to ruin whatever the hell this existence is.

It’s hard wired into our DNA to have friends and enemies. I get that and I understand the historical context. But why can’t we all just use our evolved brains and get along? The first lesson you teach a kid is to share their toys. Guess what? Earth should be a shared toy.

We all deserve a good life as long as there’s no harm, no foul.

Can we all, at the very least, get behind that idea? This timeline is escalating too quickly.

SpongeBob is a goldmine for so many subtle jokes.