There’s a lot of really good advice here, I’ll just pitch in one thing I’ve been working on myself lately: mindfulness. Awareness of yourself, your surroundings, and how you feel (both emotionally and physically).
I’ve struggled a lot with the same problem of bottling emotions up, but I often do it because I don’t even register all of the little emotional paper cuts that feed into it. It’s helped me to make it a habit of stopping and assessing myself and asking “hows does this make me feel and why?”
Start doing that for even the little things and you’ll find it gets progressively easier to stop and assess even the bigger things. Won’t always make you feel better, but oftentimes all we need to avoid blowing up is that second of “stop and think” to make us cool off just a bit.
Ultimately, I would still put blame on the publisher for dangling such a huge incentive over the devs heads. They probably didn’t think the devs could actually pull it off and are now scrambling to convince everyone it really isn’t ready.