• A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      19
      ·
      10 months ago

      Right. Some people handle this well, others are not open to it. Willingness to adhere to monogamy is a thing that varies from person to person and must be discussed in any relationship. Ethical nonmonogamy is a thing, but it’s not for everyone, and it is a lot of communication and intimate work.

      • Monkey With A Shell@lemmy.socdojo.com
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        10 months ago

        I find the notion of ENM peculiar. Just the name starting with ethical gives it an ‘exception to the rule’ feel, that the default is unethical.

        It’s like the terms open or swingers (which is a slightly separate thing I get, but in the same space) didn’t exist before or are no longer acceptable.

        • A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          10 months ago

          I think ethical nonmonogamy casts a wider net. I wouldn’t call myself a swinger. I don’t do parties or anything like that. But I’m still not monogamous and it’s still not cheating since my partner and I have an existing arrangement and regular check-ins.

          • Monkey With A Shell@lemmy.socdojo.com
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            3
            ·
            10 months ago

            I guess I’m more getting at the term itself than the concept. People for a while have sometimes said ‘we have an open relationship’ which to my mind is functionally the same thing. The other nearest option would be non-partnered in which case a title isn’t needed anyhow.

            The part that seems weird to me is by specifically labeling it as ethical, it implies that the standard non-monogomy is unethical which seems like a strange stance to tie a lifestyle to if usable terms exist.

            Just the philosophical musings of a fairly vanilla middle age dude navigating the modern social world though. 🙂

    • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      arrow-down
      21
      ·
      10 months ago

      I said, “indicative of”, not, “yea you’re insecure”. Amazing how you children cannot parse basic perception from accusation.