Or should I lose hope in humanity completely now?

  • CoachDom@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    In my experience, old age only amplifies person’s traits - if you were nice, you are going to be extra nice because of all the stress leaving your day to day. If you were a cunt, you are going to be extra cunty because now you will be blaming people left and right for all the errors in your life. That’s my experience though.

    • Turkey_Titty_city@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      exactly.

      plus people surround themselves with similar people, so as people become extra cunty they associate with extra cunt types.

      • Rambler@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Never a truer word spoken - > you can always tell a person by the company they keep.

        Heard that when I was a teenager.

    • Captain Janeway@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I think people can grow and change. I personally used to be quite cunty. Mostly because I was self conscious and - ironically - sought validation. Now, I’m less that way. Thanks to therapy, self work, and medication. I like to think I’m nice, but I know I can still have an edge from time to time. I like to think I’ll continue to improve as time goes on!

  • I Cast Fist@programming.dev
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    1 year ago

    Some get better, some get worse. You really can’t generalize this. A friend of mine used to say that “we have to ditch the wise elder, because some people accumulate stupidity with age instead of wisdom”

    • Xariphon@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      For years now I’ve responded to anybody saying we should “respect our elders” by saying “they just don’t make elders like they used to.”

      It was easy to be old and wise when the world only changed on a scale of centuries. Now it’s easy to see large cultural changes every decade or less; the wisdom of somebody who came of age in the 1950s is of no value today if they’ve learned nothing else since.

  • S_204@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I’ve become MUCH more of a twat as I get older/ now that I’m over 40…

    I just don’t have patience for the sillyness anymore. You wanna be a unicorn furry? Sure, whatever, I dgaf just gtfo my way so I can go about my life without your bullshit interrupting me. You wanna spend all your time talking about immigrants or your culture, i’m going to walk away…if you follow and annoy me as that type tends to do, i’m going to take the gloves off and bury your stupid ass with facts based in the reality you insist on avoiding.

  • borlax@lemmy.borlax.com
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    1 year ago

    From what I’ve seen it’s a bell curve most of the time. People grow up and stop being little twats and eventually get to the point where they start to become big twats.

  • Mothra@mander.xyz
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    1 year ago

    Depends, this really depends on what exactly you consider being a twat, how old is the person in question and what kind of people they surround themselves with/what sorts of experiences they go through.

    I’ve seen people mature tremendously and they were cases I considered totally hopeless. In contrast I’ve also seen people who appeared to have their sht together, suddenly flop in the most stupid of ways.

    • AFK BRB Chocolate@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      This answer I think is the closest. People can get better or worse over time and there are just so many factors. I’ve seen kind people go through horrible tragedies and become bitter and isolated. I’ve seen people who were cutthroat ladder climbers come to realize that the ladders aren’t going to mean anything after a certain point and their legacy is going to be kids who don’t want to spend time with them.

      The one thing I’ll say that seems to be often true of men is that when they get older the testosterone is less intense and so life is a little less driven by it.

  • ATQ@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    It’s usually kind of a U with the top sections being comprised of very young and very old people with the kind of limited intelligence and suicidal bravery to not believe that their actions have consequences, and then generally mellowed out, moderately reasonable, people in the middle. YMMV though.

  • Papanca@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Some great comments below, but i also wanted to add that i think it depends on how open and honest one is. For example, it happens quite frequently that i change my view on something, because someone (usually one of my adult kids) points out certain things that i didn’t know or thought about. And then i can just apologize and tell them they are right. It keeps me humble and open to other viewpoints or scientific facts that i didn’t know or consider. If someone just kindly points something out to me, that makes it easy to apologize. But if people are hostile and tell you you’re wrong in an aggressive way, then it would be pretty hard to admit you hadn’t thought of that.

    But from what i see, there are a lot of people who just don’t want to seem dumb, or are extremely set in their ways, and they will never admit that they were wrong or that there are different ways to see or understand something. Rather, they become angry, or grumble, or change the subject.

    • Hextic@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Add to this, I don’t know how far back but the Boomers, Silent and Greatest Gen all were brought up on a strict “respect your elders” mindset which by the time it got to the boomers is “I am Older therefore always right by default and how DARE you try to correct me!!”

      This is also why world governments especially USA is full of geriatrics because old people don’t vote for anyone younger than them (if there is a choice) because they don’t want a goddamn whippersnapper telling them what to do. The most stubborn kind of old person that is.

      And man, they got pissed when the rest of us collectively learned that just being Old doesn’t mean shit. The boomers had to bend the knee HARD to their parents authority or they get insta slapped. So they expect, or demand their kids/young people in general treat them the same as it’s their Turn now.

      But instead we learned they can be wrong and being Old doesn’t mean infallible. And they hates it… BIG MAD they are!. They cope and seethe and mald all over the internet and at the polls. We are literally living in a Baby Boomer tantrum cuz young people will not “respect” them as they were forced to do their parents. Yeah just growing old doesn’t mean shit you gotta back that with experience now. Like Nazis whom only thing to be proud of is being Pale.

      • Papanca@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I’m not that young myself anymore, and i definitely recognize my very strict upbringing you mentioned, but in my view respect needs to be earned. And not once, but over and over again because people change. Seeing most political leaders being very old white men makes me cringe. They often just don’t understand the modern world. Just an example; they make decisions about cybersecurity while i’m convinced they don’t know the first thing about it. They probably rely heavily on their advisors and just echo what they say would be best.

      • Papanca@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        You always have a choice. Just stay informed, surround yourself with wholesome people, and be willing to change your views if needed. I don’t think you become a certain way just because you age.

    • Turkey_Titty_city@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      deeper than that. a lot of people’s entire identity/value gets wrapped up in patently false beliefs. and being wrong about that means they are wrong as a person.

      that is why so many yahoos have this ‘or die’ dedication to complete nonsensical beliefs and become violent when those beliefs are challenged.

      • Papanca@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Yes, definitely. Another thing that comes to mind, reading your reply, is that people surround themselves with like minded people. That can be a good thing, or very bad.

  • Turkey_Titty_city@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    I’m in my late 30s.

    No. People who are twats just become bigger twats as they age. People who are not-twats remain not twats.

    Some people become twats because they become bitter and angry at the world for not giving them what they think they ‘deserve’.

    • lemmy@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      To be fair most people do deserve much more than the world aka their governments are willing to provide.

      • Turkey_Titty_city@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        No, they don’t. Most people squander what they are given and are bitter about not being given more which thy would also squander.

        • lemmy@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          No person should be deprived of shelter food and health care. And people are rightfully angry when their governments don’t provide the bare necessities to people in need.

  • Sandman89@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    In my experience, the majority is great. The problem is that the loudest and most intrusive ones monopolize all the nearby attention.

    My recommendation would be to find some quiet third places in which to seek out people you enjoy being around.

  • PenguinJuice@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    I think people become more dead set in their views but less likely to be outright assholes about them. I think its a combination of lack of energy to be a dick and a dwindling social circle focused on quality relationships over quantity.

    Some people will always be assholes though, but the fast majority don’t have character disorders.

    • AttackBunny@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      I agree, but I think it REALLY depends on the person. My family 1000% proves that people only get worse with age. People that were assholes to begin with, only become bigger assholes as they get older, and less capable. Especially if they were “super independent” before. That also seems to hold true, in my experience, for people who were very independent and suddenly lost that, regardless of how they were before. Narcissism seems to increase exponentially too.

      I also have some much older friends (like 80s and 90s older), who were always really good people, and are still just honest, down to earth, good people, just a little needier.

      I guess what I’m saying is that people don’t tend to change, and the person they were as an adult is only amplified as they age, from what I have seen.

      • ArtieShaw@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        This is my experience as well. I think I’ve seen it expressed as “people become more like themselves as they age.” For good or bad. This has helped me learn to lower my expectations when it comes to people.