Ataraxia

Well, at least in the US it is hard to find a good doctor. I’ve had so many doctors, one had my gallbladder taken out unnecessarily and cancelled all my other check ups that were meant to find out what was actually going on with my gastrointestinal issues. All I needed for my gallbladder was a diet change which they never told me. It was I decently good shape when they removed it. That same doctor wouldn’t refer me to a psychiatrist to diagnose ADHD due to the fact that I had anxiety and didn’t want me on stimulants despite the fact that treating ADHD would likely eliminate the anxiety problem in the first place. I had new doctor who told me to treat my chronic spine pain and surrounding muscle, neck, shoulder, head, and eye pain with ibuprophen and a freaking chiropractor. No referrals to actual specialists… it’s likely due to a bulged disk from a previous neck injury that yet again had been left untreated. So I deal with tingling and numbness every so often as well as POTS now. The doctor after that prescribed me a fatal dose of prevalite the pharmacist warned me about and I was like yeah, no way I’m taking anywhere near that much. I still ended up having to stop because hw never warned me about all the bruising it would cause. This same doctor also told me that nobody needs to eat anything but meat because that’s where all the nutrients where when I told him I’ve developed a strong intolerance for any kind of carbs, even whole grains and beans, even most fruit, as they make me seriously ill and trigger my IBSD… Instead of helping me figure out a way to have a more varied diet than green vegetables and animal products (can’t make good pizza with just that)… he just said stick to my diet. Yes, eating that way erased my inflammation and saved my guts but who is gonna live that way? So I’m back to slowly dying. Thanks doc. Oh, and he also told me that my tachycardia could be due to the covid vaccine even though I had the symptoms way before I ever got it… 🙃 I’ve given up. Even my cardiologist wasted my money. He saw that my resting heart rate often was around 120-140 and was planning all of these tests to find out why, gives me a monitor to stick on me which cannot get wet or be sweated on for 2 weeks so clearly I can’t work out or do anything that’ll make me sweaty or cause me to need a full on shower AND put me on propranolol which of course lowered my resting heart rate and left it at that. He then blamed anxiety. Well now I’m on 20mg of lexapro and happily can’t feel a thing in terms of anxiety or depression which is great but my heart rate is still at suicide levels when I’m doing something as mundane as dry my hair or cook.

I just wanted a doctor who would take the time to listen to everything my body is telling me, do more tha a few blood tests, keep working on it until we figure out what all of this is and get me a diagnosis for one or multiple issues (autoimmune?) I’m dealing with. I just want to be able to function again and not be homebound worried that if I lose my wfh job I won’t be able to work.

So it’s great when someone finds a good doctor, I’m glad. But many people experience what I have and I’m so tired at this point, I try to just keep going until my body finally gives out… or I can become a cyborg. I’d sell my remaining working body parts to be a cyborg.

In italy we bought everything outselves including books. Teachers never paid for anything.

Tankies aren’t communists anyway. They’re Russian trolls, CCP shills. Those are fascist dystopias. Just mention Ukraine being invaded and they go ballistic.

Lol lemmy has a Tankie problem but they’re being drowned out. They get mad because they can’t just own the libs I guess!

I get three days off a week and just got off of a 3 week long vacation and I slept a bunch lol. Played videogames. If I could never work again I’d just relax and enjoy food and entertainment.

So far I replaced eternity with it. Eternity kept crashing and the swipe sensitivity was horrible. I’m liking liftoff. Crossing fingers.

I believe in me. You are all being perceived by me. And anything I cannot perceive is not in the realm of existence.

Maintaining the status quo is what keeps humanity from progressing. Slavery was acceptable and still is in many places, except for where the status quo was challenged. Having kids should no longer be the status quo and it won’t be long until civil rights catch up to the abusive nature of being created without consent.

Except it’s a choice.

I didn’t chose to be born nor did I chose to be a child. I have the right to be irritated though by other people’s mistakes. It is completely OK not to make humans. We are not just mindless beasts only good for reproduction. People have a right to find people’s poor life choices distasteful, lie smoking cigarettes and doing drugs.

Makes me think that a lot of these people are pissed off that those who can’t afford or just don’t give a shit about being sentenced to parenthood for life won’t have anyone to exploit when their kids grow up. Also misery loves company. People get really angry when they realize their life didn’t have to end that way and that they actually had a choice so to validate their mistakes they shame and try to push others who didn’t into the same so they can say “there, you see? There really isn’t any other choice”

Where is everyone getting these jobs? Even if it’s slow I am still doing my job every few minutes unless systems are down.

Atomic barbie and my phone is jabrone

The instance isn’t yours. It doesn’t belong to the users. You are graced with being allowed to use it. The owner of the instance is the one that gets into legal trouble because you want to post your loli furry pictures to the world. If I ran my own instance I would be restricting content as well. And federating with an instance that hosts that shit forces them to also host that content.

What’s funny is these tankies are making the whole left look bad and I have to remind myself that these people are a tiny minority of disaducated extremists and not to let them put a bad taste in my mouth for anything socialist. I noticed their existence and rhetoric was pushing me right and now I’m realizing they’re very likely conservative trolls, fascists trying to make the left undersireable. A social democracy is what I look forward to, not licking putin’s aashole.

Nah man ive seen coworkers who spent this whole time in the office and caught covid multiple times become imbeciles no matter how good they were at the job. I’ve been home this whole time and I’m working with so many idiots.

It is weird. I love this stuff. It can be so useful and would love a game with interactive npc. Also really fun tools to brainstorm with.

Last time I was in Japan there was actually shit on the spray nozzle at the hotel.

We have them like that in italy and I don’t know anyone that uses it. We used it as a second toilet as kids. Pee only.

As long as I’m wfh it can snow all it wants