Mayor Poopington

With the right equipment, every ATM is free!

I’m certain they reproduce asexually. My mom gave me hers and she still has some in her kitchen.

You have those chickens too?

A smart TV is a dumb TV when it doesn’t have an internet connection. I won’t put mine on the wifi and do everything through Chromecast or Xbox.

Doubt anything like that id available for sale. He took the radar from a car, probably needed some serious tweaking to get it to track smaller objects and ignore larger ones.

If you have any military connections, get your hands on a AN/APG-81 from an F-35 and cook all the mosquitos in the room. Get any pets or food out first, of course.

For when you run out of 5.56 before third period biology

You should click that link you decided not to follow. It goes into the context of the photo itself.

Imagine teeth grew like our nails and had to be clipped regularly

Easy, more bees

Really we should just replace mathematics with bees. I can’t think of a problem that can’t be solved with more bees.

With bourbon, honey, and lemon

you must not have kids or animals