That weird compulsion to always be in pursuit of a relationship might be gender dysphoria.

At some point it will happen to you, and you will be sober. And when it does, you will remember this day.

I mean… Was she into it?

Can you at least unlock it later with experience points or in-game currency?

Good question. I don’t have a good answer. I just wanted to pause for a moment and reflect on how concisely this question captures the moment we’re living in.

Calling everyone “man”, “bro”, “you guys”

When will they add the option to sort processes by “reason your fans are blowing”

You don’t think the #tuesday chatter is exciting? For real though, I get the same vibe. It usually makes me close the app shortly after I open it. Maybe I’m not giving it enough of a chance.

One of my acquaintances started a fairly large group text thread recently. Somewhere along the way someone said, “Who’s the android user in here ruining everything?” I never said anything in the thread, so I felt like I was in the corner of a crowded room wearing a disguise about to be exposed.

I was also pretty annoyed. Like, what’s it matter? Texts are for text. Text works fine.