There was this legendary comment on reddit to a thread asking people what would their plan be if they were immortal and got milion dollars, but there was a superintelligent immortal snail also with milion dollars who would want to kill them. I was trying to find it but as far as I can tell OP removed it. Does anyone here have it and could post it here by any chance?
I think one of the stipulations was that it couldn’t be killed
But it could be detained. So, put glass over snail. Shuffle glass to edge of table with a card to keep the snail in the glass. Turn glass over and seal with several layers of plastic wrap. Place sealed glass in a small safe. Put the small safe in a bigger safe. Pay a deep sea fishing vessel to bring you and the safe to the location of the Mariana Trench. Drop safe from boat into the trench. Have fishermen drop you off in Costa Rica, retire as a hermit living on the beach.
As the safe descends into the trench, it implodes.
The snail is now free and seeks its revenge. The snail will taste blood.
Impossible…the safe is made from reinforced steel, not carbon fiber…
It’s interesting how blithely people consign an immortal super-intelligent being to ostensibly millennia of consciousness, while entombed.
I’m no hippie, but I would probably prefer to be touched by the snail than know I had tortured another intelligent being for many lifetimes.
So, we pop one of those apple airtags on the snail, right. And we also schmooze with the TSA so the snail ends up on all the no-fly lists, passport revoked, all that. But, as a trade, snail gets free drinks anywhere, for life, so at least there’s refreshments to lament over.
The snail’s not that intelligent. It voted for Trump twice, has a thin blue line punisher sticker on its shell, and thinks immigrants and The Gays ™ are responsible for its social ills.