Ok, I have no idea why this bothers me and I don’t even know what to call it. My husband is a “come here” guy. Something he thinks is interesting and wants to show me - hey, come here! Nuclear apocalypse - hey, come here! Why the hell wont he just tell me why he wants me to get up, trudge to wherever he is, so that he can reveal the surprise like some sort of performative art ? I never know if it’s going to be legitimate, a disaster, or something stupid. The walk to wherever he is is insanely stressful because the whole time I’m running through all possible horrible scenarios (we’ve had a lot of issues at the house lately so I never know if I’m going to find water in the basement or raccoons in the attic or a hole in my foundation, or just him looking at a funny cat video). I’d rather he say “hey, babe, something is happening wherever/whatever, come see this.” Instead I have to have the whole performance and reveal and I fucking hate it. Anyone else know what I’m talking about or am I just mental ?

  • moog@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    instead of letting contempt fester in you why not literally just say “im busy rn can it wait?” and then give your partner some fucking time later to share something with you they find interesting? you sound like a bitter person tbh. maybe just talk to them damn.

    • Saraphim@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      I have talked to him. He acknowledges he does it but doesn’t know why. I’ve explained how stressful it is for me, and he says he understands. I’m bitter because it annoys the fuck out of me, not because he’s trying to “share” with me.

      • Good_Chemistry@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        My partner did this, I just started responding with “What is it??” every time without moving. He was doing it because he hates shouting across the house, but when I responded that way he’d come to me to show me whatever he’d found/was doing/needed help with/sometimes kitten videos.

      • natanael@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        How about asking him to come to you instead each time? Or try to find some other way to help him break the habit. Don’t let yourself get too worked up about it.